FRIENDSHIPS

July 22, 2016

To have a friend, one must be a friend.

I'm getting there. I know kind of how to be a friend. But I'm getting better at it. Slowly but surely. What really counts is loving others and showing it in the best ways you know how. And in the ways they can understand and appreciate. That second method is tricky sometimes, but it's possible. I love my wonderful family! I want to show them in all the best ways and get past my personal insecurities and worries--- and just love without expecting anything back. Just because I love them. <3

March 21, 2016

It has been a thought many other times, and it has come again to me recently. 

How necessary is it to have a "best friend?"  And am I the only one in the world who doesn't have one?

Well, I have my husband who certainly is my best friend! We go through a lot together and support one another, and can share a whole lot with each other. I am incredibly grateful and happy to have him in my life!

I'm talking about the other kind of best friend-- the "bestie" or whatever. For women, it's usually another woman. Because, well, there is a lot we go through that guys just wouldn't be able to understand. 

I have exceptionally wonderful friends and acquaintances! Please don't be mistaken by my wonderings. Truly, my life is full of amazing people and influences!

And yet, I don't think I'm best friend material. For one, it's really hard for me to be vulnerable and open with most people. Then I surprise myself by sharing stuff with some people, but it's because I so want to share it with SOMEONE that it ends up coming out with anyone. And maybe it's because I'm embarrassed of my raw, unfinished self sometimes, and I don't want anyone to know about that. So I keep myself guarded. 

Most people have a best friend outside of their family circle because, well, sometimes family can be tough to deal with and it's nice to have an outside sounding board who isn't super emotionally involved.

Lately I've wanted to have my siblings be my best friends. And I desire to give enough to those relationships so that can happen.

I don't know. I really don't. It's a conundrum for me. I think it's kind of late to have a bestie because most grow up with theirs. Or have known them for most of their life. And maybe I'm not the kind of person who really needs one. But then--why do I kind of feel left out?

The one thing I DO know and can count on is my Heavenly Father and my Savior, Jesus Christ. Even though I can not be in their physical presence at this time, I feel their love and influence. I know I can always go to them for anything I am struggling with. And even though I may not get audible responses, I do receive comfort and strength and advice and answers. We all have this opportunity and this life-line in our lives. We just need to reach out. <3

July 21, 2015

I'm not going to lie. I've had some rough times with each person in this pic the past few months...including myself. But I've also had some really great times with them! And the great times out-number the not-so-great so it is all GOOD! :)

My husband and I haven't agreed on some things, but we've been able to work through it together and continue to grow closer and more understanding of each other. <3

I continue to struggle with how to strengthen my relationship with my beautiful step-daughter...or even to know what kind of relationship we're supposed to have--- but I know I love her so much and hope she knows I will always be here for her. She is an amazing gal with a tough situation and is in a time of her life when she's trying to figure things out for herself. <3

My 3-year-old tests me to my very limits of patience...and I often go over-board. Yet those occurrences are decreasing and I am learning to enjoy her more instead of be annoyed that she's not listening to anything I'm saying or doing anything I've asked her to do. However, I've noticed that the more calm and loving I am about things, the more she is that way too.<3

My sweet little baby boy-- almost 5 months! I should know that babies change their habits frequently and that each stage presents new things to figure out....but it doesn't diminish the frustration when I'm not sure what to do next. Yet I'm recognizing more and more that he is an absolutely wonderful baby, and the not-so-wonderful times are really actually quite miniscule. He radiates love! <3

In addition to my family, I've been able to make moments happen with cherished friends from my past. I know it's not always necessary to stay in touch with EVERYONE-- even really good friends. But I've really needed that re-acquaintance with many, and I'm so grateful they have been able to get together! I really have been blessed with awesome people in my life! <3

p.s.-- those thank you notes I mentioned in April...most didn't get delivered until June, and some still have to be sent off. I hope I get out of this procrastination slump with notes sooner than later! :)

April 21, 2015

This pic is symbolic of the cute and useful stuff that I have been given for my new baby. In trying to be a better friend, I really want to be better about thank you notes. I have still not written or sent any, even though a shower held for me was over a month ago. But I still want to express my thanks. This is a reoccurring theme in my life, unfortunately. I have great intentions and continually think about what I want to do...but seldomly accomplish it. It is a wonderful day when I actually DO. I'm giving myself a deadline of this coming Sunday. Deadlines help me a lot-- even if I end up waiting until the last minute. Impending doom (of not getting something done in time) is usually an effective motivator for me. :)

February 23, 2015

My Best Friend

This month my best friend and husband turned 40.  As much as he's not fond of his birthday OR parties, I still wanted to have a big celebration. Our anniversary is two days after his birthday, so I told him that for my anniversary present he should let me do the party. He agreed. Although he put a stipulation on things-- that I couldn't be involved in any preparations on his actual birthday...the day of the party.

How that was going to happen, I wasn't sure. I just knew that I had to make it happen somehow. Well, I spent over a month in preparations and recruiting people to help. It was all coming together. And then a couple days before the event, he had a change of heart. He would take our oldest daughter to the boat show he wanted to go to that day instead of me, and I could help get things ready. PHEW!!  Thank goodness. It probably would have worked out okay, but not as much according to my "vision" of what I wanted it to be. We had a family event that included a bagpiper playing as my husband entered the room, a taco salad dinner, and then a family talent show. Even though there wasn't a ton of participation in the talent show, it was still a good excuse to get together with family...and I think my husband ended up liking it okay despite himself. :) I was happy to express my love and friendship through a special event just for him!

P.S.-- I also was able to be resourceful and economical with the decorations. I had paper cones and tissue paper pom poms for party hat center pieces, punched out paper stars for confetti on the tables, sewed blue and white flags from flat sheets we never use, made more tissue paper pom poms and paper chains for other decorations. Time consuming, but fun and not expensive! (I have plenty of paper to be used up) 

Family Relationships

So, originally I had the areas of Family and Friends as separate things to work on.  Well, thinking about it-- family relationships are just like friendships. And I want to treat them the same way...that they're not just automatic and something to take for granted. They are relationships I want to cultivate and improve with those who happen to be related to me in some way or another.